Pray-er

There are frequent New Testament accounts
Of Jesus rising early in the morning,
Before the sun is even up,
And seeking a quiet, solitary spot
Where he can spend time
Praying with the Father.

I am beginning to understand
Why he had to do that...
Because his prayer list
Must have been immense
In comparison to mine,
And I now seek time away and alone
Simply to pray for those people or situations
That I have knowledge of.
(Imagine how long it would be,
The prayer list of
The Son of God!
It's amazing He slept at all!)

Something strange
Is starting to happen...
My friends are starting to ask me
To pray for them
And their intentions.
"Pray for my friend Mike,
One treatment away from beating lung cancer."
"Pray for my friend Cindy,
Who had brain surgery
And is still recovering."
"Pray for my dad Oleg,
Sick in Toronto,
And no one knows exactly what's wrong with him."

So many petitions, Lord,
I am bringing,
And keep bringing
To You.
I feel like a child,
Running into Your House,
Yelling, "Daddy! Daddy!"
And then telling You
The next thing that I need Your Help with.
But it's more than that, even...

My own house used to be
The place my friends sought when in distress.
My friends would seek my parents' advice.
My home was always open to them,
And my parents never turned anyone away,
Even if they didn't like them or trust them.
In my head, I am reliving this scenario...
I'm bringing my friends to Your House,
And telling You about them,
And asking You to help them, too.

Father,
Forgive me for those moments
Of half-assed praying,
When I'm either too tired or distracted
To really focus on communion with You.
Forgive me for those moments
Of not listening,
When I'm too busy yammering
To hear Your Response.
Continue to be gracious to me;
"Save me in your kindness." *
Draw me to You,
And protect me
From myself,
My enemies,
My well-intentioned friends,
And the world at large.

"Lord, teach us to pray,"
Was something that the Apostles
Asked of Jesus.
They saw the direct correlation
Between His prayer life
And His God-given powers.
Lord,
Teach me to pray...
To reach up to You,
And let You reach down to me...
To listen, and act accordingly,
To continue to bring things to You,
On behalf of myself
And my loved ones...
To pray with ever-increasing boldness and clarity,
As You use me to work Your Will in this sphere...

Father,
Help me empty myself
Of myself
To be filled
With You.
Every day,
Help me become more like Your Son.

Meet me whenever and wherever
I seek Your Face...

* Psalm 31: 17

Pete's Prayer

In the chaos of yesterday's move,
Pete the goldfish was left behind.
He's coming with me to work this morning,
To travel UPS overnight to Arizona.

Lord,
Watch over Pete
(And his companion the snail)!
Let me package him well,
And find heat packages
For him to travel with!

You create out of joy,
And we revel in Your Creation.
Thank you for the laughs and joy
Pete has brought to us.

Keep him safe in the dark.
Being him to the light
Of an Arizona morning!

Community Lunch

The last Saturday of every month,
My church holds a community lunch.
We bring and prepare food,
And serve it to anyone who comes.

Saturday's lunch may have been
The last I ever serve at New Utrecht.

I look out at the faces,
And recall stories
I have learned over these months.

There are the grandparents
Raising their grandkids,
Because their parents are deceased.
There are the Latina moms,
Anna and Emi,
Looking for work to support their kids.
There is Louise with her autumnal-colored hair,
Whose watch I fixed,
And helped her up and down the stairs.
Today she spoke about
Her husband, and daughter, and son.
Where is her family, I wonder.
Why does she live in an assisted living facility?

The people who attend lunch
Are a rich assortment of real people.
Old and young,
Families and loners,
People who usually respond to a smile
As though no one has smiled at them in years.
Some don't smile back.
Those are the ones I really worry about.

Lines from "Eleanor Rigby"
Run through my head:
"All the lonely people -
Where do they all come from?
All the lonely people -
Where do they all belong?"

How many are here for the food,
And how many are here for the company?

There are points throughout the lunch
When I think otherworldly thoughts.
I think about
What a meal would be like in Heaven.
Would it be buffet style,
Or would we be served?
If served, served by whom?
Would there be music?
Would we recognize each other?
How would we find each other?
Strange, circuitous thoughts
As I serve baked ziti, broccoli, and string beans.

You are serving lunch to eternal beings,
The thought sounds in my head.
You are serving lunch to someone
You may be dining next to in Heaven.

I look around,
And out,
And Beyond,
And pray that
I will have more chances
To serve a community lunch...
More chances to combat
The poverty and loneliness
That haunt so many lives.

God,
Grant that it may be so...

Safe Passage: Wave 3

Lord,
The next wave of sojourners
Leaves for Arizona
Between today and tomorrow.

Wave 3:
The king,
Pete,
The corals,
The plants,
And the truck.

Lord,
We pray that the king has
An easy, uneventful trip.
Tomorrow night, he will sleep
Soundly in Arizona.
He has worked so hard, Lord.
Restore his tired body and mind.

We pray for Pete the goldfish,
Being overnighted.
He started out as a joke
Too convoluted to explain,
And then, he appeared!
The momma watches him swim to and fro,
And it helps her Alzheimer's.
Keep him safe in the dark,
As he travels on a plane.

We pray for the corals,
The hobby and passion of the king.
They are so beautiful, Lord,
Explosions of color and life
That he lovingly tends,
Not unlike a shepherd
Caring for its flock.
He is packing them, and shipping them,
Also overnight.
Let them be back in a tank
By Tuesday evening.

We pray for the plants.
I do not know the history
Behind Adalheid's and the king's,
But You know the memories
Connected with mine...
The Golden Pothos is from
The first Mother's Day
We celebrated after Daddy had passed.
The Coleus has blossomed incredibly!
It started out as a little bit of a thing
That Laura Hernandez gave to me
After an ad campaign that ran in the papers
Got several kids placed in foster homes.
It was a token of her appreciation,
And oh, how it has grown!
The little plant
With the spotted pink leaves
Whose type I do not know
I bought because it felt like Adalheid,
Being pink and all...
Lord,
Our plants are watered and packed,
About to embark on a five day road trip.
Don't let them languish
In the cold and dry they must now endure.
Preserve them, Lord.

Lastly,
Guard over our possessions, Lord.
Our collective lives are on the truck -
Furniture and instruments,
Necessities and household goods,
Our virtues and vices (books!!) alike.
Give the truck a smooth, easy ride.
Make the driver or drivers
Alert, attentive, and careful.
Keep him or her safe from
Their own misjudgments,
Or the miscalculations of others.
Please keep the weather favorable,
And the roads clear.

Father,
I bring all these prayers before you,
And ask for further protection
For my friends and the creatures
We now transport.
Protect Wave 3 as they embark,
And guide them safely to their new home.

Vacuum

Lord,
I spent today
Meeting the people
Who would probably replace me
In my job at the newspaper.
This last lady we interviewed
Has the goods, Lord -
I can feel it.
She would gel well
With the team and the Aussie.
She has people skills,
And technical skills,
And project management experience.
She comes across as confident
Without being obnoxious...
As hands-on,
Willing to learn, act, and listen,
And possessing the knowledge
Of when to do which.
She's not afraid of the minutiae,
Of the day-to-day operations
To get things done.

Lord,
I started out updating website content,
And paginating.
I didn't know anything about newspapers.
When I look at my role now,
How wide it has grown,
And all that it has come to encompass,
It surprises me in its breadth and scope.
I have been praying to You
About the vacuum left
When I would leave.
I have been asking You
To fill that vacuum,
And of course,
All the scenarios that I have envisioned
Have turned to dust.
Lord, is this Your answer to me?
Is she Your answer to us?

Ah Lord, let it be so!
Let Human Resources like her,
And let her accept the job offer.
Let her step into
The space my job has come to occupy
So that my team and the Aussie
May continue to be supported and upheld.

Father,
Grant that it may be so.
That place -
And the people in it -
Have come to mean so much to me!
Fill the vacuum
With Your Plans
And Your Presence...

Midpoint Praise

Lord,
The king and I
Had a conversation last night
And the two of us shared
The same thought:
The journeys to Arizona
Have reached their midpoint,
And everyone who has gone so far
Has gotten there just fine.

With the exception of a piece of luggage,
Adalheid, the momma and Fifi,
Peany, her son and Snooki
Are all comfortably settling in.
"Better you forgot you Mom's clothes
Than her medications," I reminded Adalheid.

The birds arrived in one piece,
All feathers, beaks, and talons in tact!
No heart attacks, no body dysfunctions
From changes in altitude
As the vet had implied.

I had sung to Spanky yesterday morning,
Sung to him "Edelweiss," which he loves.
And then I had told him,
"Now you have a safe trip,
And don't be afraid of anything!
You and I
Are going to play in the backyard,
In the Arizona sunshine!"
He looked sideways at me, like, "Yeah?"
I kissed my little Sienna.
I tried to get Corky to respond to me,
But she wasn't so inclined.
Then I asked You to bless the birds,
And give them a safe flight.

I left the house
With my heart in my mouth.
All day I pestered You.
All day I petitioned You,
And all day the voices
That battle for dominance
Waged war inside my mind.
The me that is still bound up in the world
Doubted and worried.
Christ at work within me
Kept reassuring me
That no harm would come to the birds.

You have been gracious to us,
My God and King!
Safe passage for half the household
You have granted us so far!
Thank You, thank You,
For your steadfast love and protection!
Continue to be with us
As wave 3 and 4
Make their respective trips.
Continue to be with us
As we settle into our new home,
And bless that home,
And fill it with love
As it was filled in Brooklyn...

I know You're here,
Guiding us.
We are grateful,
And humbled,
And awed
To be able to call You
"Father..."

Toronto

Lord God,
My young friend arrived in Toronto
To find her father very ill.
Doctors do not know what is wrong with him,
But You do, Almighty God.

Father,
I pray for the man
Whose name in Old Norse means "blessed."
A husband and father,
There are many who worry for his life.
We humbly ask You, Lord,
To restore him
To the fullness and vibrancy of life.

We pray
For You to reveal the source of illness
To the doctors who so desperately seek it...
For the full arsenal of treatments
Used to battle the infection
To take root and flourish...
But ultimately, Lord,
We ask that You reach down
And touch this man
And heal him.
Deliver his life from the pit, O Lord,
Because You are good,
And deal mercifully with us,
And take pity on us.

Father,
Please heal the man whose name in Old Norse means "blessed."
Grant him Your Blessing,
And healing,
And life.

Our Father: A Life's Reading

Our Father, who art in Heaven,
(Lord God Almighty,
Creator of the universe
And sustainer of my life,
You are everywhere.
Your Presence holds all life together.)

Hallowed be Thy Name.
(Blessed be Your Name!
May all peoples
Come to know You
And proclaim You their Redeemer!)

Thy Kingdom come.
(Yes, please,
Make Your Kingdom manifest,
Visible and available
To all who seek You!)

Thy Will be done,
(Yes, Lord, Your Will...
What would please You?
What would bring You
Glory and Honor and Praise?
How can we manifest
Your Will here on earth?)

On Earth as it is in Heaven.
(Because we know
You're exercising
The full extent of Your Will
In the Heavens,
And not yet in this mortal reality.
We can't wait for that day to come!)

Give us this day our daily bread,
(You know we have needs,
And what those needs are.
Provide for those needs
On a day-to-day basis.
Give us what we need
When we need it.)

And forgive us our tresspasses
(We have an awful lot of these.
Words, gestures, or looks
Meant to intimidate or convey disdain,
Carelessly scattered in our daily dealings...
Thoughts focused more on
What we can get out of life
Than put back into it...
Plans of malice and deceit,
Flung into action,
Forcing others to reap
The fruits of our bitterness...
Ignoring You,
And all that You have
To teach us.
Hate is not the polar opposite of Love;
Apathy is,
And too often,
We live our lives
Not caring about You.
O Lord, we are but dust.
Forgive us.)

As we forgive those who tresspass against us.
(May we extend
The same degree of mercy and kindness
To those who screw us around,
Hurt us,
Malign us,
And abuse us,
As You extend to us
When we screw You around,
Hurt You,
Malign You,
And abuse You,
Either directly rebelling against You,
Or indirectly damaging others.
Cultivate pity in our hearts.
It is the only thing
That can infuse hope into
The wretchedness of our lives. *)

And lead us not into temptation,
(I know Scripture says
That we are never tempted
Beyond our means to avoid the temptation, **
But I must tell You that
It usually doesn't feel that way!
Pushed and pulled
By forces internal and external,
We often feel
That submission is the best way.
It's certainly the easiest way.
Give us the strength to persevere,
To hold out, hang on,
And rely on You
To steer us away from sin and death.
If we keep our eyes
Focused on You,
Your Light will eclipse
The darkness threatening to extinguish us.)

But deliver us from evil.
(And when bad things happen -
Illness and injury -
Fear and betrayal -
Disaster, destruction and death -
Comfort us. Help us.
Reassure us. Save us.)

Amen.
(So be it, Lord...
So be it,
All the days of our mortal and eternal lives...)

* The Divine Conspiracy by Dallas Willard

** No temptation has overtaken you that is not common to man. God is faithful, and he will not let you be tempted beyond your ability, but with the temptation he will also provide the way of escape, that you may be able to endure it. (1 Corinthians 10:13)

Mizpah

Laban said, "This heap is a witness between you and me today." Therefore he named it Galeed, and Mizpah*, for he said, "The Lord watch between you and me, when we are out of one another's sight. (Genesis 31:48, 49)

A search for the word "Mizpah"
On Amazon or eBay
Will usually yield
A collection of pendants and rings,
Inscribed with the slightly older translation:

"The Lord watch
Between me and thee
While we are absent
One from the other."

She will be in Arizona,
And I will be here,
And the house will slowly empty
Of its occupants.

The next two and a half weeks
Will be very strange indeed!

Father,
You know the workings of my heart.
Watch over her,
Guide her,
Protect her,
And help her.

* Mizpah means watchpost in Hebrew.

Ash Wednesday - One Year Later

A year ago on Ash Wednesday
I began this devotional blog.
"God-blogging," Adalheid affectionately calls it.

My first post was intended to be
About "Ash Wednesday,"
But I had a blog misfunction,
And instead first published "Shalom,"
About finding peace and home and myself
At my best friend's wacky house.

Perhaps there really are no accidents.
Here we are, a year later,
And Shalom is being transferred
To Arizona
On Ash Wednesday.
God grant us all safe passage,
Human and creature alike.

Adonai,
Master Author of Life,
And Giver of All Good Things,
As I receive ashes tomorrow night,
Remind me of
My mortality,
And the brevity
And preciousness
Of life.
Remind me how
This corrupt, perishable flesh
Is becoming
An eternal place of worship
Occupied by Your Indwelling Presence.

Rebuild me,
Reshape me,
Remake me,
My God!
Transform my ashes
To suit Your Purposes!
I travel Eternity's Road
Seeking You!
No -
Finally allowing You
To seek - and find -
Me.

I'm here, Father.

I am not afraid...

Safe Passage: Wave 2

Creator God,
On the day that I post this,
The birds will be making
Their way to Arizona.

Wave 2:
Spanky,
Corky,
And Sienna.

Father,
I sing Your Praises
For the beauty of Your Creation,
And the creatures You have put
Into our care.
I thank You for the gift
Of Adalheid's parrots,
Now part of my life
That is bound up with Adalheid's.

Thank You for the beauty,
And personality,
And joy
That the birds bring to our lives.
Grant that,
They too,
Will enjoy long peaceful years
In the Arizona sunshine.

We are all afraid, Lord.
Afraid of the effects
The flight on a plane
Will have on the birds.
The vet had much to say
About their transport.
I bring his concerns before You,
And lay them at Your Throne,
To do with as You will.

Father,
I beseech Your Protection
For the birds.
I beg You to grant them
A favorable flight,
And a new life in Arizona.
They too
Are part of our family,
And we ask You
To take pity on them,
And comfort them on the flight.

All our lives are laid bare to You, O Lord.
Preserve those lives.
You designed us
To love and cherish
All creation, and all creatures.
Protect those creatures
We care for
During our time on this earth.
As Your stewards,
We humbly ask
For safe passage
For the creatures You have entrusted to us.

Father,
Preserve the birds,
Not because we deserve it,
But because You,
You alone, O Lord,
Are the Steadfast One.
Preserve them
For Your Name's Sake.
We love them, Lord.
Watch over them,
And carry them safely
To their new home.

Safe Passage: Wave 1

Lord God and King,
On Wednesday we begin
Our trips to Arizona.
Wave 1:
Adalheid,
The wandering Momma,
And Fifi.
Accompanying them,
Providing moral and material support,
Are Peany, her son, and Snooki.

You are the Protector
Of all who sojourn.
You have compassion
On those who journey
To foreign lands.
You have preserved the lives
Of those whom You,
Directly or indirectly,
Have sent about Your Work.
Be with my friends
As they board that westbound plane.

Give peace to the wandering Momma.
Contain her confusion and troubled mind.
Give patience to Adalheid and Peany,
Patience to cope with
The wandering momma,
The birds once they arrive,
The truck once it arrives,
And the king, once he arrives!
Protect Fifi from new and strange creatures,
And from re-straining her back
As she explores her new home.
Let Peany's son find a college there,
To be close to Peany and Snooki
Once they relocate.

Lord God,
Our lives are in Your Hands.
Protect my friends
As they sojourn to a new home.
Watch over them.
Guide and comfort them.
Be ever near,
O Gracious One.
Be ever near.

Living Words

I've always been enchanted
By the art of storytelling.
My mother, the writer,
Read to me from a young age.
I would sit, enraptured,
While she read to me
From the Golden Books,
Grimm's Fairy Tales,
And the Disney Tales.
I would envision the scenes in my head,
And be transported into the story.

I've always been guilty of having
An over-active imagination.
Bursting loose at the seams,
I started writing when I was 8,
And haven't stopped since.
I discovered that there was power in words,
And I would construct
The worlds and adventures
I saw in my mind.

Now...
When I read Scripture,
The words are becoming
Alive to me,
Leaping off the pages
And dancing before my mind's eye.
At Sunday service,
When the Pastor reads the Bible passages,
I no longer read with the congregation.
Instead,
I sit
And close my eyes
And listen
Like I did when I was 3 or 4,
And in my mind's eye, I see...

Elijah carried to Heaven in the fiery chariot
Before Elisha's astonished eyes...
Samuel, hearing God's voice,
Mistakenly running to Eli's bedside,
Declaring, "Here I am"...
Adam standing in the Garden,
Fulfilling God's order to name the animals...
Jesus on the mountaintop,
Conversing with Moses and Elijah
While all his stupefied friends can utter is,
"Let's make a tent!"...

The Bible's words
Are coming alive,
Imprinting themselves
Upon me.
I dream about them at night.
I think about them during the day,
And compare them to my everyday life.

Father...
Is this supposed to happen?
Is this one of the ways
The Word becomes alive to us?

I didn't think it was possible
To feel the awe and wonder
I used to experience as a child.

How wonderful to learn
How wrong I can be!...

The Golden Note

La Traviata at BAM...
It is that instant
Before the curtain rises
When the orchestra
Sounds a singular note
In glorious unison.

I shake in my seat.
Goosebumps race across my skin.
In that note,
I hear
The harmony of the Triune God...
The pregnant promises of a Creation
Not yet redeemed...
And the siren call of My God,
Beckoning across the ages
To this current moment in Time
With me...

O Lord,
I hear you everywhere these days...
I wait for the day
You will let me sound notes
With the choirs of angels and the redeemed
Before Your Throne!

Until then,
Stoke the growing fire in my soul,
And use me to bring
Your Music
To this still-broken Creation
And all its Creatures...

Hardness of Heart

Sister,
I was six years old
When Mommie and Daddy
Brought you home.
I remember commenting to Mommie
About your then-red hair,
(That later fell out and grew back in
Dark brown)
And then-blue eyes
(That changed color,
Like the eyes of puppies and kittens,
To dark brown)
And egg-shaped head
(What did I know
About a baby's fontenelles
Back then?)

I think about these things
And remember these things
The morning after I have seen you.

Mommie was always telling me
To look after you,
Which I suppose is the way
Of parents with their oldest children.
Somewhere in my mind,
I still hear Mommie saying this to me.
The problem now is that
We are both adults,
Becoming more fixed into
The personalities
We will carry with us to eternity,
And I am the source
Of the anger and resentment
That radiates from you.

Ma,
Any suggestions
On how I can fix this?

Sister,
You feel jealous,
And resentful,
And cheated,
And nervous,
And negative
About my pending move.
The arguments you use against me,
About abandoning my family,
And not being able to find a job,
And never seeing me again,
And upheaving the pets,
And embarking on what will surely be
Another failed undertaking,
Flay my soul...

But I still want to go.

God willing, I am still going.

Do you understand nothing
About wanting a fresh start,
And jumping at the chance
Of making a much-needed life change?
Do you understand nothing
About hearing a call,
Feeling something so strongly in your bones,
That you choose to follow it?

No...
For you,
This is about Adalheid,
About a relationship you believe
Should be yours, and yours alone.
That insular mindset
Of Mommie and Daddy
Is indelibly stamped on you,
Isn't it?

You don't understand
That because Adalheid loves me -
With no strings attached,
No sentiments of what I owe her,
No punishment,
No dredging of past and present sins -
Because she loves me
In the spirit of freedom and truth
And the true freedom of being fully known
And not being rejected -
She doesn't have to use
Ploys and games and guilt
To control me,
Or bind me to her.

And because of this -
Because she has liberated me
Within the human sphere -
I gladly accompany her and hers
On this next leg of her life's journey.
I'll follow her
As long as she'll let me,
And when Death parts us,
I will pray to El-Shaddai
To reunite us in the After.

I wish
I could share these things with you.
I wish that you could see
The healing and happiness
Her friendship has brought to my life.
I wish you could
Be happy for me,
Wishing me luck,
Helping me pack,
Helping me bear the burden of emotion
As I sift through the layers of my life
And mourn for the losses.

But no...
This is not your way.
You have hardened your heart
Against me,
And I fear how this will manifest
Once I step on that westbound plane.

Father,
Soften my sister.
Make her less rigid,
Less judgmental
Of me.
You formed this family,
Calling it forth
From the blood of two continents.
You gave us each other.
Do not allow our foolishness -
Our pride, our stubbornness,
Our presumptions or our desire to strike back -
To disband the members that are left.

My whole life through,
I will always have only one sister...
Restore her to me, my God.
Bridge the distance
That she daily seeks
To drive between us,
A distance much wider
Than a plane ride
From New York to Arizona...

Up In The Air

I have never been
A fan of change.
I am a creature of habit,
And although I am quick to learn,
I am often slow to incorporate
Learned lessons into my being.

I have never been
A fan of the unexpected.
I desire to possess knowledge,
So that I can tackle
Any and all situations head-on.

I have never been
A fan of major upheaval
Probably because, in my life,
Those changes have been
Abruptly devastating,
Altering and ending lives
With the swiftness of a tornado.

The unsettled state I am in right now
Is starting to manifest
In the ratiness I am showing
My fellow humans.
I am testy, short-fused,
Over sensitive and over wrought.
My mind is plagued with misgivings
About my pending move.
I am working straight through
Until March 9th.
For my Classified Team,
I am trying to bleed my brain dry
In an effort not to leave behind
A knowledge vacuum.
I am subcontracting my second job
To my friend the Russky,
And forfeiting that much-needed pay.
My sister,
Who wants nothing to do with me
Once I leave,
Wants to ensure I give her
Money owed towards Upstate house bills.
Juliette the Pug,
Suddenly stricken with partial blindness,
Needs further, expensive diagnostic testing.
Gabrielle the Cocker
Looks as spry as ever,
But I worry about the lumps
The vet detected in her breasts,
And living with the decisions I have made
On her behalf.
I am trying to finalize
Temporary foster arrangements
For Romeo and Juliette.
I am praying and talking to God
About various friends
Walking in darkness.
I am trying to finish packing,
Discarding the detritus of my life,
Keeping what I think I will need,
Giving away what I'm not taking,
And everywhere, everywhere
Touching supercharged mementos
Of the life I had with my parents.

The Enemy assaults me
By planting doubt everywhere he can.
"You're not going to find a job
When you get out there."
"You're not going to find your own place
When you get out there."
"You actually think you're going to
Learn how to drive?"
"Your sister will truly
Never speak to you again."
"What if something happens
To your loved ones
While you're in Arizona?"

Lord, Lord!
Everything is up in the air!
Unfinished, unresolved,
Pending, anticipated,
Undecided, undetermined!
I can't cope
With these pressures,
Internal and external,
Real and imagined!

HELP!

...

He is reading this
Even as I write it.
Leaning over my shoulder,
I feel the smile on His Face.

He often smiles at me
When I am my petulant, frustrated self,
Not in a condescending way,
But in a
"Can't you trust that I have this situation
Under control?" way.

He taps on the screen,
Pointing out the title
Of this soon-to-be published blog post.
Not understanding,
My expression asks him to explain.

"And when he had said these things, as they were looking on, he was lifted up, and a cloud took him out of their sight." *

I blink.

"Up in the air. I am there too," he says
(In case I missed the point of His quote).

I nod.

"You are not in control," He reminds me.
"You never have been.
You never will be.
I assure you,
You're in very competent Hands."

And with that brief
Word of assurance,
He has nothing else to say.

I deflate,
Like a slowly-leaking balloon,
And mentally assign
All the situations
The control freak in me
Is screaming about
To Him.

Maybe
Being up in the air
Is the best place to be
After all...

* Acts 1:9 ESV

Beseeching the Master Craftsman

Lord,
What marvelous creations
Are Man and Woman,
The work of Your Hands!
Intricately crafted,
Allowing for thought, feeling, and sensation,
Allowing for communion with You!
Our mortal bodies
Temporarily house our
Immortal selves,
But because these bodies
Are (for now) made of dust,
They are subject to decay.

Lord,
Adalheid's friend
Sits in a Florida hospital,
Recovering from brain surgery.
She is not as she was
Prior to the surgery.
We beseech You
To hasten her recovery,
And restore her fully whole
To her loved ones.
We ask You to reach down
And handle her healing Yourself,
To rewire and reform
That which You created
When she was still in the womb.
O, Master Craftsman,
Heal her brain,
Her speech,
Her memory,
And any other functions
That are now impaired.

Anointed One,
The Face of the Father on earth,
You healed throughout
Your three-year earthly ministry.
You healed all who came to You.
You healed all who sought You on behalf of others.
I beseech You in this same way,
On behalf of Cindy and her loved ones.
You sustain all things.
You bind up the broken,
And the broken-hearted.
Reach down, Lord and King,
Shepherd and Sacrifice,
And heal the work of Your Hands,
To the praise and glory
Of Your Everlasting Name!

Rainbow

"I have set my bow in the cloud, and it shall be a sign of the covenant between me and the earth." (Genesis 9:13)

"This is the message we have heard from him and proclaim to you, that God is light, and in him is no darkness at all." (1 John 1:5)

Lord,
My God,
Your bow hovers in the sky,
One sign of the many truces
Between You and us.
It is a reminder
Of how You do not want
To destroy us,
Your handiwork.
Yet, what exists between
You and us
Is only a truce,
And not yet true Shalom.

So many of us
Are down here,
Fumbling in the dark,
Groping madly,
Consciously or unconsciously
Seeking a glimpse
Of Your Face!

Father,
I have a friend
Burdened by the
Spirit of Heaviness.
Her struggle has been lifelong.
I clearly see
The ravages of her life
Borne on her shoulders.
She urgently needs
Your Light.
I do not know
What forces or powers
Bind her so,
But I beg You
To illumine her!

You touched me,
And I was healed.
I know that You uphold us,
That You give us strength
In our hours of need.
You alone, Almighty One,
Could shine one tiny, dim ray
Of Your Schechinah Glory
Into her heart,
Eradicating this darkness
That devours her.
You alone, O Lord,
Could do this.
Won't You?

If You will not ravish her
Immediately with your light,
Please declare a truce.
Let Your bow hang in the air
Between You and her,
A sign of Your faithfulness
To all who earnestly seek You...
A sign of possibility,
Of a glorious future
That will eclipse this present darkness.

Father,
I humbly ask You
To release my friend
From the bonds of despair
Enveloping her.
Allow me to bring
Comfort and hope to her spirit
As your emissary,
A child of the Living God.
Grant me wisdom,
And courage,
And patience,
And kindness,
And all other necessities
To divert her course of action.

Protect us.
Heal us.
Do battle against
The forces of evil
That oppress us.
Guide us, Abba,
Ever closer to You,
And overcome the griefs
Of our spent souls...