Saturday, March 31, 2012

Nesting

At the furniture store.
Adalheid and the king
Are shopping for
Dining room chairs.
As I walk around
Looking at the couches, tables and chairs,
I am struck with sudden homesickness
For my third-floor walk-up, Brooklyn apartment.

I am unsettled, Lord God...
Unsettled and nettled
By a sensation of not belonging.
It is not external;
It is within me,
As I wrestle with that part of my nature
That longs to nest,
And the other voice within
Telling me not to nest
In Adalheid's home.

It was so easy in Brooklyn.
I lived ten houses away
From my best friend.
I could invade her house at will,
But still retreat to my apart space,
And not feel like
An interloper or burden.

It is different here,
Large, sprawling spaces,
And the closest apartments
Are three-quarters of a mile away.

Three quarters of a mile
Compared to ten houses!...
My point of view
Needs to expand
In accordance
With this state's geography...

Father,
Remove this unsettled feeling from me.
Remind me that,
At the end of the day,
It matters not
Where I lay my head,
So long as I abide
In fellowship and communion
With You...

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