The Mole

So, Lord,
What's the best way
To get to me?

Send in a mole
(Albeit, an unwitting one)
To enter into my heart,
My confidences,
And all the deep recesses of me.
Then,
Once inside,
Use her to break me
(Albeit unwittingly).

Clever!
Much more effective
Than anything I could have
Come up with,
Even in my most self-destructive moments!

Hearing Your Word
Was a hundred thousand times worse
Than hearing it from her.

I'm throwing my hands up in the air.
Surrendering. Done.
Despairing now.
Not caring if that's a problem or not.
Convicted by the Spirit
From over two thousand miles away,
I relinquish all things, even hope.