Oligopistoi

If God adorns the grasses that pass in a day, to be burned as fuel or as trash, "will he not do much more for you? You little-faiths!" (6:30). Here, Jesus uses a term that may have been his own invention: oligopistoi, "little-faiths." It occurs ten times in five verses in the Gospels. It seems to have been a nickname that he invented as a way of gently chiding his apprentices for their lack of confidence in God and in himself. *

Whirlwind week.
We are being tested,
Pushed and pulled,
The joy and hope of an Arizona move
Tainted by sudden, negative events.

I confess
That the thoughts in my head
Have been more in line with
"What are you doing?"
Than
"I'm so looking forward to this!"
Anxiety, fear, and doubt
Are at high levels,
Evidenced by an increased desire
For chocolate and sleep.

Lord,
You know how my brain becomes
When it functions on the micro level.
I get lost in the details,
Burdened by fears and doubts,
Misgivings and negative emotion.
Guard my thoughts.
Protect my heart.
Extinguish my anger and frustration.
The Adversary is pounding at me
Harder than usual.

Faith, Faith!
There's a reason why you
Are the shield in the armor of God.
You protect us from
The fiery darts of the Enemy. **
Right now it feels like you
Are one foot in diameter,
And I am exposed to
The thoughts, emotions, and temptations
Of the Enemy.
Grow, expand,
Until you fill my field of vision,
Until I am encompassed round about
By the knowledge of
The Love of God.

Anointed One,
It's as if I can hear You,
Standing before Your disciples,
Calling them "Little-Faiths."
There is no condemnation,
No judgment,
No reprimand in your tone...
Merely the calm assurance
Of One who sees All,
And knows better,
And unfailingly trusts the Father.
Speak thus to me.
Fill me with Your Faith
So that I may look,
Unflinchingly, ahead...

* The Divine Conspiracy by Dallas Willard

** Ephesians 6: 10-20