Cocker Prayer

Lord,
Gabrielle goes for tests tomorrow
To see if the mammary lumps found
By the vet on Sunday
Are cancer that has spread to her organs.

Lord,
Gabrielle has been my friend
These past ten years.
I remember when she was a puppy...
That first morning after we brought her home.
Mommie found her sleeping
With her tongue sticking out,
Looking like she had
Passed in her sleep.
She came to me -
Always to me -
To check if the pup was breathing.
I watched the slow rise of her stomach,
And poked her for good measure
Until she opened her eyes
And looked at me as if to ask,
"Can I help you?"

She has never, from day one,
Respected or feared me,
But she has always, from day one,
Loved me.

Gabrielle,
Eater of money, Bibles, and books...
Lover of cats but not so much dogs...
Eternally linked to my mom
Through your advanced vocabulary
And appreciation of fine music,
Particularly "Deck the Halls" and
Piaf's "La Vie en Rose"...
You are my furry friend,
Listening,
And understanding
All that I tell you.
You grieved with me for Mommie.
You transitioned to a different kind of life
With me.
And now,
When we are so close
To warm days
And a backyard again...

Father,
I have made
The best decisions I can
Concerning Gabrielle.
I will ultimately accept Your Will,
But I will beg for her life nonetheless.
Please don't let it be cancer.
If it is cancer, don't let it have spread.
I dream of long walks with her
In the cool of an Arizona pre-dawn.
I dream of throwing her sticks to chase
In Adalheid's backyard.
Adalheid prays for her too, Father,
Prays for a few more years
Basking in sunshine.

Father,
Gabrielle's name
Comes from You -
From Gabriel -
Strong man of God.
She has always been strong...
Continue to be her strength
In these days and weeks ahead,
And give Adalheid and I
The strength to face
Whatever comes next.

Eli,
A few more years
Basking in the sun...
Please?...